March is really not a good month for me/my family.
Six years ago this month, I lost my uncle Jim.
Four years ago this month, my grandpa passed away.
And last night, Paul’s uncle Marty died. He had been battling a rare bone cancer. This was an “expected” loss, but a loss nonetheless. The sadness comes in waves when I stop and think about having to bury Marty next week. His face comes to mind at times, smiling like he always was, and I feel my stomach drop knowing that we won’t be able to see him again. You will be very deeply missed, Uncle Marty.
Last week, I wanted to post about the conclusion of the Harry Potter movies, but a lack of time prevented it. I’m glad that I took my time in creating this post, though, as it let me get my thoughts together.
In the weeks preceding the release of the movie, I had mixed emotions. I, of course, wanted to see the movie right away because I’m a huge HP nerd (case in point: I re-read the entire series over the last couple of months and re-watched all the movies last week to prepare myself…). However, part of me really wanted to postpone it because I just couldn’t imagine not having some sort of HP something to look forward to. We did end up seeing the movie Friday evening (there really was no doubt in my mind that we would), and while it was a great movie, and a satisfactory conclusion, I was left feeling a bit disappointed. There were things I would have put in the movie, or things that I would have kept faithful to the book, but sadly, no one asked my opinion. But that’s not what this post is about.
So many of the posts I’ve seen about the HP conclusion, and so many of the comments I’ve overheard (including comments from my aunt’s 16-year-old granddaughter) have been along the lines of “Oh, it’s the end of my childhood.” Why? Why does that mean the end of your childhood? Can you not read the books anymore? Can you not re-watch all the movies? Can you not plan a vacation to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter? Are you not freakishly obsessed with the upcoming release of Pottermore? Just because there are no more movies or books does not mean I will cease to be the age equivalent of 13. For example, one of my birthday presents was the Lego Harry Potter Wii game. Paul and I sat up and played that until close to midnight last night. How old am I? (Well, since you asked, 26. Yesterday was my birthday. 😉 ) Anyway, the point of all of this is that you’re a child for as long as you want to be, and the end of the HP movies does not signal the end of my childhood. Dumbledore said it best: “I will only truly have left [Hogwarts] when none here are loyal to me.”
So long for now, Harry. I’ll see you next time ABC Family has another Harry Potter Movie Weekend Event. 😉
Tonight, I attended my first 8th grade graduation ceremony as a school staff member. I wasn’t really anticipating being particularly emotional. I knew going into it that I would miss my seven 8th graders (or…4 of them, anyway), but I didn’t really plan on getting worked up watching them walking into the gym. But there they were, all dressed up, looking like young adults…and I immediately teared up. I gave them each a “hooray!” when they walked by me, and I clapped silently for each of them when they got their diplomas. And afterwards, I tried to seek out a couple to say congratulations and give them hugs goodbye. I found one right away, and said a quick goodbye. I accidentally bumped into one of my girls and told her how proud I was of her, and that’s when I started to hear the quiver in my voice. And then, out of nowhere, as I was walking out the door, one of my boys (one whom I would never expect to do anything like this) not only sought me out to say goodbye, but gave me a hug as well. It breaks my heart a little (in a good way) to think about how much I want them to succeed in life. I’m going to miss them all terribly.
But tonight just reaffirmed that I am in the exact right place right now. This school was absolutely where I was supposed to be this year, and it’s where I’m meant to be for a long time. It’s been several years since I’ve felt at peace with where I am in my life. I forgot how good of a feeling that can be.